On Paul

I teach a class at Makerere University on the foundations and history of psychology and therapy.  Inevitably, I teach a section about Carl Jung.  Jung was a bit of a hippie before hippies were cool, and long before they were bourgeois.  He taught about personas and archetypes and the authentic self.  He said things like, "Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens" and "We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses."  I don't follow Jung's methods, but I do, indeed, like Carl Jung.  

Last night I was sitting with my friend Paul.  Paul has a way of pulling away in the moment, casting an air of arrogance over things.  It irritates me.  I began to muse about Carl Jung and his teachings on archetypes.  Paul sat and listened.  He asked me which personas I see in him.  I told him about the way he becomes seemingly  aloof.  He listened.  Then, he asked, "Do you know that you do that, too?"  I should have known.  Carl Jung also said, "Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."  

Paul asked if anyone could ever meet my expectations in life.  I said, "Of course not, but I have no intentions of lowering them for anyone, not even myself.  I think it is far more liberating to learn to say, 'Forgive me' than it is to water down life to expect only the mundane so that one doesn't experience grief or disappointment."  Paul thinks I'm weird.